Wednesday, February 21, 2007
8:56 PM
I am not emo.
Training sucked, and I can't stop searching for you. ):
I need to stop doing it, stop gathering people to go down to the canteen and wait for you to appear. I won't do that again, I must stop, I must stop, I must stop, I must stop. I don't wanna care if anyone loves you and you love her back. I don't wanna act like an idiot, a stalker, a bloody irritating person. It's not me, I've been possessed this past month.
Class dance cannot make it. 2/3's not harmonised, not united. With so many things all coming at once, I think I'm gonna break down soon. Sorry loo for not being able to turn up for the lit project, and there's chinese test tomorrow, and then maths test on friday. I need to pass both with flying colours.
I'm so tired now. I need a pair of wings, I need to seek comfort from someone/somewhere. I need to meet someone new, just to help me forget. Forgive my selfishness, but I can't love myself when I'm like that. I need to stop trying so hard to achieve so many things.
I need to learn to be happy again, I need to learn how to smile, I need to learn how to let go, I need to learn how to love proper, I need to know how he feels, I need to know how they feel, I need to know so many things, but I have no idea how to.
I wanna cry, but I can't cry.
I still have so many things to say, but it's better not to? I don't know, I'm so tired now.
Sorry oriana for making you run so much today. Sorry tania for hitting you so many times with the volleyball. Sorry for this post.
Thanks hanwee and baohui laopo for the talks, and lollipop. Thanks mei mei and deborah for being there to talk to me. Thanks jia ming for the money.
I need to be strong now. I thought I've learnt from past mistakes, I guess I haven't. Gonna load myself with things to do, just to make sure you wouldn't appear in my mind.
Wo hen ai ni, dan ye hen bu hui ai ni.
Zhen de bu ke yi gei wo yi ge hao hao ai ni de ji hui mah?
♥