Saturday, March 31, 2007
10:08 PM
I hope gaygay will be alright soon.. ]:
8:47 PM
Our love is like an old tv drama - cliche, but you can't live without it.
AMKSIAN FAMILY DAY! :D
Woke up at 5 to get ready to meet popo and simin. Met them in the mrt, and we went to harbourfront together. We've missed the timing for the sun rise, so we went for breakfast at mac's and then went to take the bus to go to sentosa. We saw shuai ge! HAHAH! :]
We were like the first to reach there, and we started playing volleyball with a two girls from UWC I think. Yeah, then after a while, people started streaming in, and started playing volleyball. I've been playing for the whole morning and afternoon, just staying there and hithithit the ball. xD
Yeah, then went to look for gaygay at 2/5's corner and we decided to go out. :] Cashmere decided to pon band, then germaine came to look for him, talking about jaron's expectations of him and all that, then I started tearing because I was touched? Then more people came to ask him to go for band. Then I don't know why, I started crying. =/ Think I'm quite bo liao.
But in the end, he still decided not to go, so we went to wash up and got ready to go out. We planned to watch movie at plaza sing, so we took the bus to don't know where to wait for another bus to go back to harbourfront. Then.. xD we held haaaaaaaaands at the don't know where, and we were forced to take photos. I was super malu la, can? Cos so many people looking plus I looked like a tomato because I was sun burnt. Buuuuuut, very xing fu la. ^^
I kept talking nonsense and random stuff today, and I think cashmere's appreciating it. ;D Gaygay swingswing.. ]: & no matter how me and jan tried to cheer her up, she's still emo. Sighhhhhh.
Went to plaza sing with chan chuen, jan, mingming, faris, winston, gaygay and cashmere. On the way, I was listening to ai de zhu xuan lu, and lied on cashmere's shoulder and I felt veryveryvery xing fu and couldn't stop smiling. Heeheeeeee. Wanted to watch TMNT, but then the queue was suuuuuuuuuper long and tickets were selling like hotckaes, so we went to dine at carl's jr instead. Mingming's suggestion! Haha!
The burgers were HUGE, so mingming shared with cashmere and I shared with jan. Mingming and cashmere yi ren yi kou like a pair of couple la, so cute. :D Then jan fed mingming fries. Awwwwwww, so sweeeeeeeeet. HAHAHAHAH!
Then.. yaddah blah, don't wanna talk about the things that happened because spoil mood. -.-
Went to cineleisure with mingming, jan, cashmere and winston was pulled out of the train by cashmere. & cashmere's sian face looks like maple's f3 today! So adorable okay. Hahahah! Went to eat ice cream at.. can't remember where - mingming's suggestion yet again. :] Went there talk, and then I kept correcting mingming's pronounciation. Haha! xD
The ice cream came, then jan fed derrick. Then cashmere fed me. Awwwwww. xD Then winston was feelin very sian and refused to eat the ice cream by himself, so jan had to feed him. She was busy baby-sitting two big babies! I think she has the qualities to become a veryvery good mother okay! xD
I was stewpit and dripped ice cream on my shorts and shirt, so went to change to another shirt and jan suggested taking neoprints, then everyone except winston was okay with the idea, so winston bo bian. xD HAHA, he's very cute la!
We went home after that and mingming went to wait for his aunt to pick him up. :]
WO JING TIAN HEN HAPPAYE YE HEN XING FU. WO HEN AI NI, XU YI HONGGGGG.
Diabetes = caused by too much salt intake.
Vegetable = cai ren
Burger = bugger
I love the mistakes you make. :]
& I'm reading your letter over and over again, and I just can't stop smiling to myself. <3
Friday, March 30, 2007
10:43 PMLaopo gave me piggyback rides today. :]
& I love my boyfriend! :D
Popo, fafa! You're gonna lose please. We're gonna last, and more than 3 months at the rate that we're going.
The love's growing every single second. Day by day, you're becoming irreplaceable.
7:29 PM
It's the cursed 13th, but we'll make it through - because I love you, and you love me too. <3
Maths lesson was alright, and I think I'm finally getting the hang of stewpit maths equations. :] Science lesson was slaaaaaack. I slept for about 20mins and only woke up because I got shocked by popo slamming my correction tape on my table. Haha, I realise I can think better after sleeping! I got smarter. Hahahah! English lesson, mrs lee came in to replace nair! :DDDDDDD I hope nehneh don't come baaaaack.
Went to mac's with fafa, popo, laopo, farhan, bestest and didi. Oreo ice blended with laopo. :] Then after a while, went off for oral. We were assigned to class 3A, and I was looking through the class till chloe called me, "annabelle, your name leh." So I went over, and I saw this bloody piece of mahjong paper with my name on it, and it's talking about suicide. Like wtf la, like to use my name so much? zzz. ifwehoighaigoahwgjwapwe. Was super pissed.
Oral sucked, I think I'm gonna fail so super badly. :[ Fuuuuuuuuuuuck. Went to slack at 2/4, then went to the toilet and I realised that my menses is here again! Like wth, stop for about one week only then it's here again? I'm gonna ask mummy to bring me to see the gynae sooooon, or else I might seriously bleed to death.
Training at 3, was alright I guess. I can set, and receive ball! :D Did okay till we went to the parade square to receive serve and spike. My receiving was rubbish there. Went off with hanwee at around.. 6.25.
130 took super duper duper long to come la. Gah, then I saw the moon at 6.49pm. Made me feel very calm and serene. I love the moon, though it reminds me of.. >< Lalala, kept dozing off on the bus! I think it's becoming a habit already!
Walked home after dropping at shaw plaza, and then this old uncle kept walking behind me, then I was quite freaked out, so I walked faster. After a while, I looked back and didn't see him, so I slowed down my pace. Who knows, he suddenly popped out of nowhere and was following very closely, I panicked and started to ruuuuuuuun. I climbed the stairs instead of waiting for the lift. Crazy old man, scare xiao mei mei! Rawrrrrrrrr!
Today's our 13th day. :] We're gonna beat 030307's record! Tomorrow's gonna be our 14th day! Though we still can't find a common topic to talk about, and I do get upset about it and start talking nonsense, but I still love you cashmere. I got a very very strong feeling that we'll last, but my feeling's not very accurate.. We'll do our best and give our all in this relationship, yes?
Happy 10th months to jan and mingming! :D Stay sweet and lovely!
P.S ; my blog song is sweeeeeeet!
Thursday, March 29, 2007
8:00 PMIf I had to rate myself in the following deparments, I'd fail ridiculously badly.
On the scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being the lowest, and 10 being the best:
Friendship
4, because I think I haven't been a really good friend.
Relationship
2, because I think I'm the most shi bai person ever. The longest lasting relationship is with lim yongseng, in which we only talked on the phone everyday for 3 hours on average. We lasted.. 9 months? Else I guess is the 100706 one. 1 month. ;x
Kinship
2, I haven't been a good daughter or sister. I never spend time with my family any more. I'd stay in front of the laptop every night, and I'd gossip with my cousin during family gatherings.
I'm such a failure. :/ I shall strive to be a better person, if possible.
I am loud and crappy and love to be random, and whenever I talk, you'd give me that look and make me feel like I wouldn't want to ever talk to you again. I'm sorry, this is me, I can't change who I am because it's not a bad quality. It's just.. me.
Things will work out between us.
7:28 PM
Today's such a good day to blog. :D
Chinese lesson was crap, because I got all the ge shi wrong. -.- I thought she was testing us on gong han can! Yaddah, suck cock.
Popo kept changing seats with zheyu to sit with me, then we were talking and being raaaaaandom. xD YAY, I love sitting between two jeremy-s. Fafa's beside me also.
Geog test after school. I guess it was alright, though I don't think I'll get my distinction any moreeeeee. ]: But it's alright, as long as I pass with a B3.
Lit test was postpone, like thank God. Speaking of God.. I wanna go to church! No one wants to bring me thereeeeee. I'm gonna ask ade. ^^
Went to plaza sing with peachie to buy jasmine's drum sticks. Then decided to go back to school to look for gaygay. When I was walking in to school, gaygay, jan and mingming just started walking out. Then they told me cashmere just left for home. -.-
Went to mac's together to crap. Veh lame la okay, but I likeeeeeeeee. The conversations and all made me super duper duper happy and high! :D
Jan and mingming went off first to spend time alone, so gaygay and I were left at mac's. After gaygay finished her fries, we went off to look for them. Gaygay called them, and mingming answered the phone. She was shouting "down syndrome!" Then she set the phone on loudspeaker and then I knew why. We were laughing like don'tknowwhat la. Our laughter was like, "AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" in a veryvery high pitched voice.
They refused to tell us their whereabouts, so gaygay and I tried to hide and spot them behind the trees & bushes. LOL! Damn gay la, then after like, two more phone calls then they appeared. Gaygay and I were yet laughing like don'tknowwhat again when they did.
We talked and crapped for a while then mingming and I boarded 130 and gaygay and jan walked to amk station. :]
Today was fuuuuuuuuuun and bellebelle's vehhhhhhhhhhh happaye! :D
Xiao bai, ni zai na li~ xD
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
8:13 PM& everything falls apart.
I can't do it, I can't stay strong any more.
I'm sorry, I'm falling down again.
CBKIA, I have no fucking idea what I've done but whatever it is, please just leave me alone.. I'm so tired of it all already. Don't you feel bored at all?
I wish we had more than 24 hours everyday, and an average person just has to have 4 hours of sleep. I'm so tired.
I can't hold on any more.
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
9:07 PMPHOTOS! :D
In random order though. xD
8:18 PM
I think this is love.
I can't think of anything else now, except your well-being. I pray that you're alright, just a very bad cough. I'm just starting to commit, please don't let it all end so soon.
Then again.. iamsoafraidoffallingforyoubecauseidon'twanttogetmyheartbroken, andbelefttofixittogetheralloveragain, justlikebefore. Butican'tstopmyself, soicanonlypraythatyouwouldn'tbreakmyheart, andthatyoureallylovemewithyourall.
I need faith, I need faith, I need faith.
If you were to have planted the seed of love,
watching it grow everyday,
only to watch it get unrooted when he leaves,
how would you feel?
I've given my heart to you, please hold it close to you and treat it with care.
7:16 PM
What am I gonna do without you?
]:
Monday, March 26, 2007
8:18 PMDATE WITH JIA QI AND GAYGAY TODAY! :D
PE sucked, cos mr lian kept talking about our dressing, and he judge books by its cover. ]: So sad, I used to like him, never thought that he's this kind of person. Gaahhhhhh.
Chinese lessons was horrible without gaygay, I think chen lao shi's picking on me. Fuckfuckfuckkkkkkk. *bares teeth
Ate chocolates for recess, haha! Then maths lesson was alright, because I understood what mrs seah's talking about. ^^ IAP rocked with looloo! Hahahahha! Talked a lot, and I promised to make a blogskin for her, but then now I'm running out of time.. ]: EEEE, SORRY, LOO!
Gaygay looked for me after school, then we went to mac's to get our double cheese burger, then I went to get my bubble tea. HEEHEE, then we went back to school.
Went to 2/5, and started talking with jia qi and wen xiu, then wen xiu left, then some teacher came to chase us away, so we went to the mac's near amk library because I wanted to swingswing! HAHAHAHHA, DAMN FUN LA.
There were people hogging the swings when we reached, so we went to the mac's first and played at the children's playground. LOL, so cramped and all, I kept knocking my way to get through the obstacles to get to the slide. :D
Then we went to mac's so refresh ourselves. I got mcflurry, then before that, gaygay did something damn gay. ]: DON'T POST HORH! OR ELSE I MALU LIKE SAI. HAHAHAHAH.
I kept going out to check if the swing's still occupied, then finally after I've finished my mcflurry, people there were goneeeee! I was super excited, so I ran out leaving jia qi and gaygay burying their heads in their homework. :P
Went there to swingswing, then this guy from yio chu kang sec came to swingswing beside me, then started talking to me, then kept asking me to challenge him to see who can swing higher. HAHAHHA, so I've spent half of my swing date with him. :D
He's very entertaining ehhhh! HAHAHAHHA, but I don't know his name, and he keeps calling me girl. Then after that I went to look for jia qi and gaygay, and so happen that they were about to leave, so we went back to the swings together. That guy was nice la, cos his friends were back, so left only 1 swing was vacant, so he gave up his swing to us, and I let jia qi swing.
SUUUUUUUPER FUN! Gaygay and I started writing on the sand and taking photos, then we went to climb don't know what thing, then took photos also. :D
After a veryvery long while, we went to the library, but I left after a while because I wanted to finish looloo's blogskin by tonight. xD
Stewwwwwpit bus took so long. ]:Both 851 and 186, so I reached home at 7.30.
Okayyyyyys, photos tomorrow, or later after I'm done with looloo's blogskin. :D
P.S ; Eh, baby! Cbgurrl asked me to ask you to stead with her leh. :]
Sunday, March 25, 2007
9:46 PMI LOVE DEBORAH TAN WEI XIAN AKA GAYGAY BECAUSE WE XIN LING XIANG TONG AND WE ARE DAMN GAY. :D
SHE SAID SOMETHING DAMN CLASSIC.
emokid. says: hi~ *gayly xD
emokid. says: is there such a word as gayly?
emokid. says: LOL
emokid. says: lets ask the dick
another one is..
emokid. says: *hops + giggles
emokid. says: cbox is wokay old lady
♥ BELLEBELLE ; 17MARCH'07! says: YAY
♥ BELLEBELLE ; 17MARCH'07! says: you know, it took me a while to figure old lady
♥ BELLEBELLE ; 17MARCH'07! says: HAHAHAH
emokid. says: LOL
emokid. says: dont ask me why i typed that way
emokid. says: i just felt like
emokid. says: OLD LADY
emokid. says: wheee
♥ BELLEBELLE ; 17MARCH'07! says: LOL
emokid. says:old lady rocks
emokid. says:^^
AHAHAHAHHA, DAMN IT FUNNY LA. Still got a lot more, but then ayeeeee. Lazy to go scroll. xP
YAY, RANDOMNESS AND GAYNESS IS GOOOOOOOOD.
8:54 PM
Oh ya.. I remember mummy talking to my aunt just now.
She said we might consider selling the car after this year. ]:
Walao eh, change job only mah. Yes, $20,000 off annual pay is a huge amount, but it was like that 2 years ago, ain't it? Can't believe such a small move can lead to such massive changes. It's gonna be so difficult to travel around now, no one to drive me to school when I'm late, no one to pick me up when I'm sick, nothing to write about if compo topic is ba ba de bao bei. ]:
I HATE THAT LA. ]: Plus andralynn's gonna attend pri school next year, guess that's going to add to my parents' burden also. So I shall be good and stop wasting money and work during the holidays to earn my own allowance.
Rah, I hate being SO matured. I wanna be a kid so I don't have to worry about a thing, but I can't. ]:
8:25 PM
Mummy said, "So are you getting tattoo (the way she pronounced was DATOO, not TEHTOO)?"
Serene, "Huh? Da na li?"
Cos they were talking about piercings. HAHAHAH. So serene got very confused and thus her reaction. LOL!
I shall call miracle baby. Cos I like calling people baby. Okay, babyyyyy.
I love baby more now, I guess.
After zi high-ing in the coversation with him about.. HEEHEE, THIGHS, BUTTS AND BREASTS. I was doing the talking, and he was there saying sicksicksick. :D
Haha, he's so bloody adorable la. At the end of it, I asked him, "how do you like me now?" and he said, "still the same, or should I say more than ever."
I swear he made me damn happy, though it's just words. I'm very easy to cheat okay, so if you can't make your way into my heart, you know you can't sweet talk.
Baby likes me horny, because he said that we have a common topic to talk about. HAHA, nonsense! He didn't say a single thing! So I told him it's his turn next time round. :]
I haven't completed my zuo wen, so going to chiong tomorrow morning..
I love being random! :D
If there's a top ten most random people, I might get on it. xD
YAY, I'm a happy girl. I hope school and teachers won't spoil my mood. =/
& I can finally see baby after 3 days! ^^
Baby, please be true..
Please don't try to fake what you don't feel
If love's already gone
It's not fair to lead me on
Cause I would give the whole world for you
Anything you ask of me I'd do
But I won't ask you to stay
I'd rather walk away
If your heart's not in it
3:29 PM
Okay, I'm giving up on trying to do my homework for the time being. -.-
Bloody hell, I look up to those people who are able to do their homework without being distracted. Within the 15 mins that I've spent doing my zuo wen, I've eaten 1 ice cream, two pieces of ba gua, and a lot of chocolates. Meiji strawberry chocolate, kisses, merci and tolberone.
Gah, if we're gonna do the 2.4 trial run tomorrow, I think I'll die please. I'm faaaaaaaat, how to run! Rawr.
I think I might be going to watch desmond play at CCAB tomorrow, someone please come along with meeeee. Or else I'll feel so odd there. All the best for the match, daddy! :D
& anyways, I've changed my blogskin! Okay fine, it looks more or less the same, but at least there are some changes alright? & ni shi wo de bao bei is playing in the background! xD
I love the song la, though it reminds me of.. the opposite of min. ]:
Maybe I should change it to bei pan or something, since miracle likes it too. Don't know luhhhh.
Every time I look at you smiling and laughing, I wonder if I've ever mattered much in your heart.
I wanna work soooooon! I want to buy new shoes and bags. =/ Okay, sorry. I know I just got my adidas, but then I can't resist the temptation. ]:
Whateverrrrrrrr. I hate homework! Boring like shit, but I'm trying to be guai. I wanna get into chem class and then score well enough to go to SAJC! BUT IT'S BLOODY DIFFICULT TO GET ME TO CONCENTRATE ON MY BLOODY WORK! HOWHOWHOW?
*Panic. Fuck, I should just go bang my head against the wall and dieeeeeeeee.
Miracle came online, making it EVEN harder to concentrate.
Okaaaaaaay, I should go concentrate on talking to him. Haha, byebye, peeeeepoooooo!
& take care, y'all!
Saturday, March 24, 2007
10:57 PMI love long bus rides. :D
Pool rocked la. I think I just can't play in school because the cue sticks sucks. I won 4 out of 6 matches okay! ^^ Bellebelle shi qiang de! Okay la, tyco balls, but then tyco until very nice and tyco also skill! :P
Played till 4, then went to my cousin's place. Was bloooooooody drowsy, so went to my cousin's room. Serene came over also, then started taking photos. Haha, took like, 20-30 within a short 15mins leh. Then after that I knocked off on my cousin's bed.
I drooled leh! ;x So pai seh, then I think someone wiped my saliva away for me. I hope it's my aunt, if it's my uncle.. WALAO EH, PAI SEH + can bang head against the wall already.
Woke up at 6+ for dinner. xD Watched tv, ate fruits then went off. Long bus ride back home again! Took bus to terminal, then 31 to kallang, then 21 back home. Sibei long, and I fell asleep again. I'm so lazy la, can? Keep sleeping and sleeping. I think the medicine too potent already! Took in the morning, then the effect last till at night? o.o QIANG RIGHT!
Laopo called on the way, then talked. xD I looooooove talking to laopo on the phone, I don't know why also. Heehee. We talked last night also. For about.. 2 hours? Even the silence makes me feel happaye and high. Haha, laopo is damn gay la.
I am a happaye girl! :D
& happy one week, miracle. :]
I've missed you too. <3
1:45 PM
YAYE, I'm at my cousin's place nowwwwwwww. :D
Met serene and we went for a longgggggg bus ride! Wheee, in which I rested my head on her shoulder and slept for a pretty long time. Right, serene? She says I've laid there for 45mins to one hour. Hahahahaha! Yay, so coooooool right! HEEHEEEEEEE.
I'm feeling so great now. I'm gonna go play pool later. xDDDDDD
POOOOOOOOOOL!
Simin and gaygay must be feeling jealous after reading this.
I hope gaygay's fine now. ]: Please don't be emo any moreeeeeeee.
Okay la, they are going to pool already.
I'm gonna go off nowwwwww.
Tataaaaaa~
Friday, March 23, 2007
6:26 PMI wish life wasn't such a bitch. ]:
I dread not being able to spend as I like. Mummy's changing job soon, and I'm told to spend in moderation. Why can't mummy and daddy get high paying jobs and secure it so I can live in a bigbigbig house and spend as much as I like? I know I sound like a brat, but I can't help it.
I need to be more mature already. I don't even know how to talk to someone I love without being lame. I think I'm not ready for a relationship, but I don't wanna let go. I know I'm being selfish, but I want to be loved. ]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]:
Rawr, suck cock. Stewwwwwwpit fafa and laopo didn't reply my messages. I want fafa to reply la. Laopo's one is okay because it's crap. ]: JEREMY LEE WEN FATT. Eh, should be. Stewwwwpit. No one tags anymore, except for stupid people and cashmere scolding them.
zzz, I feel like closing down the blog, or removing the tagboard. =/
Okay, shut up belle.
11:13 AM
I wish I was in school all of a sudden. =/
I WANT A HUGGGGGGG.
9:49 AM
I'm finally able to get my long awaited rest. Sore throat, blocked nose, phlegm clogging up my throat. Bah, but at least I get to skip training, maths journal writing and sleeeeeeep. I think I should seriously stop going home so late and using the computer till 10+. From sunday on, I'm gonna be good and off the computer at 10.
I am currently eating secret recipe's cake and drinking vitasoy. Secret recipe's cakes are the best, please. I want it for my birthday every single year from now till I manage to find another place that sell cakes as good as this. :D
Gaygay just texted me asking if I'm feeling okay now. :] Aww, isn't she sweeeeeet? Hello, boys. Would you like her as your girlfriend? I'm sure you would be very entertained by her gayness and tio diabetes because she's so sweeeeeeet. HEEHEEEEEE. ^^
Okay, I miss my boyfriend. OMG, I'M USING THAT WORD AGAIN. Nah, I shouldn't use that word, or else we wouldn't last for even 13 days. That word is bloody hell cursed. Okay, so let's try again alright? I miss my miracle. :]
Yay, that's better. I am very capable of talking to myself and making myself happy I think. This is bad, no? I think I should go see a psychiatrist.
Seeing the doctor laterrrrr. Mummy asked me to go ask about my menses problem, but then what if the doctor's a male doctor? Aiyoh, so awkward..
Gah, anything la. It's not the first time my menses are lasting this long. I remember there's once it lasted for a month. HAHA, AIN'T IT A WONDER I'M STILL HERE? THE AMOUNT OF BLOOD I'VE LOST COULD'VE FILLED AN AQUARIUM.
I feel like changing my blogskin again. I think it's getting sooooooooo boring, but then I don't know what I want to change to. I refuse to use other people's skins any more, because my html skills are not bad, and I want the blog to be one and only, unique.
Gaygay's bothered by something again.. ]: I want her to be very happy!
You know ah, I think I'll be happier if there's no school leh. Because there's no homework, no teachers, no stress, no trainings, no bitches etc etc to spoil my day. Though I'll be at home complaining that there's nothing to do.
Then again, I'll probably die because I can't hug people and can't sit beside my miracle during chinese lessons. Okay, pros and cons. I still have to go to school, so I'd better start to love it. :D
YAY, POOOOOOOOL TOMORROW WITH COUSIN. Pool, pool, pool! Bellebelle loves pool though she can't play well. xD
You know, the deodorant I bought yesterday is contained in a pink bottle! Yay, and it smells so sweeeeeeet. Plus the smell lingers somehow, unlike the orange one. Three cheers to adidas fruity rhythm! Wheeeeeeee.
Is it true that spraying deodorant at your breasts causes breast cancer? =/ Walao, like that I think I might tio leh. Not that I delibrately spray at my breasts, but because I like lifting up my shirt and spray from the top (breasts), so I the breasts will get most of the deodorant sprayed. Which means.. BREAST CANCER.
OMGOMG. I don't wanna die so soon, and I don't wanna have my breast cut off.. ]:
I shall start spraying deodorant from the bottom. Like that will have stomach cancer or not ah? LOLLLLLL. Okay, I'm getting nonsensical here. Better stop now, or else miracle is gonna give the weird look while reading this post. :P
Okaaaaaays. BYEXZXSSXZX!
Thursday, March 22, 2007
9:27 PM& I love hugging laopo and fafa.
Though fafa seems unwilling, I know he actually likes being hugged by me okay.
I was hugging him in the morning because my tummy ached like nobody's business. I blame you, stupid vagina and womb and don't know what. The blood just wouldn't stop flowing. So fucking long already. I'm gonna fast on bubble tea. Ade says you can fast on anything what. She's fasting on the computer and tv. HAHA, crazy girl.
Okay la, I'm so tired now. I must get some sleep during the weekends. ;x
Gonna go over to my aunt's house to play pool with cousin on saturday. Gonna sleep on the way there, cos she lives at tampines. Cousin better lend me her shoulder, or else I'm gonna murder her.
Okay, I'm done talking to myself here. Random like shitzzxs.
Byebyexzsxsx.
8:59 PM
Lessons were blah blah. I can't believe I said chen lao shi was nice. -.- Fuck, I think she has something against me. Rah, then moodswing earlier today. I actually couldn't control myself and cried a little. Miracle was beside me, asking if I was alright..
I don't know, it's all so vague to me now. Everything feels.. wrong? Yet again, a hug that isn't strong, a hug that doesn't tell me 'this is where you belong'. But I do feel the warm. I know you're trying hard to make me believe in love again, I do.
Went to watch cedar's match against fairfield. Cedar won. :] Then after that, crapped with them. I like shermin and kendra. Veh cute. I think kendra speaks chinese with an cheena accent. Haha, vehveh cute please.
Went to novena with ade, bought deodorant, then went to makan at pastamania with her. I watched while she ate. Went to buy daddy's present after that.
I feel so.. unfilial and useless.. Whatever. I must stop feeling this way. I must be happy. I must be happy. Go over the words again and again. Please be happy.
Training tomorrow. I hope I won't have to get snubbed by her again. It's not my fault that I suck at volleyball right?
I'm screwed through and through.
Honey, I love you. So will you please smile?
Honey, I love you. But I just can't smile.
Wednesday, March 21, 2007
8:57 PMEveryone's so sad now. ]:
Fartsie, gaygay, popo and miracle..
God, please guide them through the dark now, they need Your help.
Talked to peachie at the playground just now. We saw the place where we left our mark. Haha, we talked about everything. Life, love, school, teachers, friends, etc etc. It's always very random between us la, but we always manage to make our conversations lame. Peachie is being silly again.. She doesn't know what she waaaaants! May you find the light at the end of the tunnel soon.
I think I'm damn useless.. I'm not sure how to cheer miracle up. ]: Everything I say doesn't seems to help. ]:
I want everybody to stay happaye! ]:
7:33 PM
Bellebelle's baaaaaack!
Chinese lessons are gay. Chen lao shi keep swinging. -.-
Kept talking and talking non stop with gaygay. But then chen lao shi kept staring at us? ]:
Gaygay's not feeling well! I want gaygay to be healthy! Take care, gaygay!
Lessons were blah, photos with denise and valval during science. :D
I lovelovelove science lessons. HEEHEEE.
Went to 1/3 to buy their HE products.
That chio bu that junjun talked about.. -.-
zzz, junjun is mad la.
Didn't go for training today, because I'm having muscle aches and flu.
Peachie ponned her physics class, so went to her class, and I saw something that I shouldn't have seen. HAHA, LIKE WTF?
Eunice is gay, kept asking me if she looks better with specs or without specs, then after that she pretended that her fingers are specs and continued asking. Haha, gaaaaaay. ^^
Went down to 2/5 to look for miracle.. Then they are shouting at each other again. LOL, forever the same. I hugged miracle! xD xD xD HEEHEE, then jiu go dating with peachie.
Went to pointer's to cut hair. But no diff. Just thinner, and shorter. -.-
Boring.. Gai tian zai lai jian tou fa bah.
Rah, no inspiration to blog today. Photos later, I guess. I think I have to put a password prompt up again soon. -.- Steeeeeeeewpit spammers.
& last but not least, I love you cashmere hui yi hong. <3
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
9:48 PMIf the hero never comes to you
If you need someone you're feeling blue
If you're away from love and you're alone
If you call your friends and nobody's home
You can run away but you can't hide
Through a storm and through a lonely night
Then I show you there's a destiny
The best things in life
They're free
Chorus:
But if you wanna cry
Cry on my shoulder
If you need someone who cares for you
If you're feeling sad your heart gets colder
Yes I show you what real love can do
If your sky is grey oh let me know
There's a place in heaven where we'll go
If heaven is a million years away
Oh just call me and I make your day
When the nights are getting cold and blue
When the days are getting hard for you
I will always stay here by your side
I promise you I'll never hide
Repeat chorus
What real love can do
What love can do
What real love can do
What love can do
What real love can do
What love can do
Fartsie asked me to stop getting attached. Haha! Okay, I'll try.. :D
One day, few years from now, I'll probably post something up, something that will remind me of my past, my everything. I feel it all coming on to me. I'm going to take a rest after this one's gone. There's this much to how much I can actually take.
Training tomorrow! Gah, I'll ache like siao. Seeing shermin on thursday, because I'm going to watch cedar's match with gaygay. :D
8:36 PM
Trip home alone has never been so interesting.
We changed seats today! I'm now sitting with quekzheyu right in front. ]: I've been good, why torture me like that? Bellebelle doesn't want to sit with duck!
D&T sucked, because of the dumb oral presentation, plus stewwwwwpit victor tan ate into our recess time talking about nonsense. Idiotic, didn't have enough time to eat a proper meal, so just ate two hawtdogs. Haha! :D
Miracle passed me his jacket after recess! Hen you xing fu de gan jue. ;x Haha, then chinese lesson after english. Chen lao shi asked me question, then I didn't give the right one, then miracle got implicated also.. ]: Sorry!
Went to look for gaygay after school, asked her if she wants to go watch stomp the yard with me after training, or I might consider ponning it for her. But she wanted me to go for training, then she went home to get her long awaited rest. She's been tired these days. My da shu's leaves are turning a lil' yellow. Hope she'll be alright soon. You're my pillar for support. You can't be down..
Went for weights training with liting. Walao eh, five sets of everything. Skipping, wrist curl, shoulder curl, sit ups, extend something or something extend and something else, I can't remember. It's super tiring. ]: My arms and legs were feeling wobbly after all that. Then went to buy bubble tea with liting.
Walked around school, then went into 2/5 because she wanted to do homework. I was free, and I didn't want to do any homework, so I did something for miracle and gaygay, then liting complained that she doesn't have, so I did one for her also. Haha, nothing fancy though.
Jiaqi came, then we started talking, then simin joined us. Don't really know each other that well, but then when girls get together, they talk and talk and talk as if they are good friends. So cool right, wo men hen san ba! HAHAHAHAH! Talked about seating arrangements, teachers, classmates etc etc. Left with simin for mac's at 6.15.
I went to buy bubble tea AGAIN. Then simin treated me to fries. Thaaaaaanks! ;D Then we talked and went to the bus stop and I boarded 88 leaving her there. Saw nadia waiting for bus at j8, then amanda's sister with her boyfriend? Haha! :P
Took 88 all the way to toa payoh interchange, then waited for 139. Then this guy (quite cute) kept turning round to glance at me. Hahah, I think he's checking me out! :DDDDDDD & if he's trying to do it secretly, he failed very badly. I caught him looking manymany times. Heehee, I'm faithful okayyyyy. Was listening to songs, and I heard the song gaygay sent to me - if your heart's not in it by westlife - and I kept smiling to myself? Okay, listening to panic at the disco's I write sins not tragedies had the same effect on bellebelle. She's maaaaad! xD
Reached home around 7.40. Showered, then dinner. I think my ear's gonna get infection. ]: It hurts leh..
Go watch the arena! The guy from UWC is hawthawthawt! :D
I'm able to look through the mistakes and remember the good of people.
With the exception of that pest in my house. Tamade irritating plus idiotic. Crazy, no reason come hit my chair with her pillow? So cheap please. Must wait for me to shout at her then she'll stop. Asshole. -.-
OH SHIT. I'VE FORGOTTEN TO DO THE BLOODY CROSSWORD PUZZLE FOR MY SCIENCE PROJECT. DUE TOMORROW! ;x
P.S; if I die, I'll probably die of loss of blood. Menses have been on having flow for two bloody weeks now, and it still won't go away. I bet the next time it comes will be two weeks after it's stopped. At this rate, I'd die before I'm 25. RAWR.
Monday, March 19, 2007
9:39 PMOH YA, during PE lesson today, we went to bishan park to jog. :D Then I saw squirrels running around! So cute please.
Then bellebelle's also very cute. SHE RAAAAAAN ALL THE WAY TO THE SWING BECAUSE SHE LACKS CHILDHOOD MEMORIES. HAHA, KIDDING. SHE LOVES TO SWINGSWINGSWING! Okay, that explains the moodswing. HAHA! :D
I love morning jogs at bishan park. xD I love swings! I love today, I love me. :D
I am super childish, I know. ^^
My miracle is sweetsweetsweet. :D
8:12 PM
First day of school, and I couldn't wake up to the ringing of my alarm clock. Daddy woke me up, and drove me to school. :D Thanks, though he nagged on the way there. I saw lightning in the car, then I kept asking why there's no thunder, why there's no rain and why there's lightning. Haha, I think daddy got irritated by me la. ^^
Reached school, chiong-ed maths homework, then laopo and fafa said I grew taller! Made me so super duper happaye! Heehee, then lessons were alright, and popo bought me my pen. :D
I love my red adidas, because people asked about it, and gave the jealous look, especially valval. Heehee, adidas, I loveeeeee youuuuuu.
Thinthin came to look for me after school, then she went off with melissa longlong. Haha, then I went to look for gaygay. They were discussing about the class tee and class dance, then both gaygay and miracle were super pissed. There were a lot a lot of shoutings. ]:
I sniffed my miracle! <3
Went to mac with gaygay and some 2/5 guys. Miracle rushed off for band for auditions, I hope he got selected.. :] Went to do d&t with gaygay, then after a while, went to buy bubble tea with renehneh and talked. Okay, we had a good talk and she was shocked by what I told her. Haha!Then thinthin came back with longlong and they went to the d&t room with us. Longlong and gaygay helped me with the cutting, then I went to drill holes for the ears of my piggy. Thinthin came to accompany me. ;D
At 4.30, got to clear up, we sneaked out. Gaygay and I chiong out, cos that uncle knew that we're gonna run away, so he locked the door. I went to unlock, then some normal people went to open, then we all chionnnnng like there's no tomorrow. I think I might have broke 100m record or something. Gaygay sort of got stuck, but then she hid behind the wall and escaped. HAHA, SUPER FUNNY AND FUNFUNFUN. :D
Went to watch people play pool, then went to play volleyball. Thinthin went off to don't know where, and gaygay went home after a while. I can't dig for nuts, I can't play at all. I've been ponning trainings for far too long.. ]: But it's alright, weights training tomorrow, then proper training on wednesday and friday. Bellebelle shall not pon!
Playing volleyball with the guys is fun la, because they got weird patterns of hitting the ball, then jiajia's ball forever so nice oneeeee. Got piak sound. I just finished complaining that I didn't have any piak sound, then a ball flew over, then both me and jiajia hit the ball, then got piak sound. HAHA, first time two person hit one ball and STILL got the piak sound you know, then jiajia's soooooooooo cute la! He said, "ah, you see! Got piak sound already." HAHA, MY JIAJIA'S CUUUUUUUTE. :P
Played till around 6.10, then went off with laopo and hanwee. Laopo treated me to green tea! YAY, THAAAAANKS! Boarded 88 then 139 home. ^^
Bellebelle says : I miss my miracle! <3
Sunday, March 18, 2007
5:51 PMImagine being locked out of your own house. -.-
Went to my cousin's house for lunch in the afternoon, then watched protege.
Daniel wu is hothothot please. :D
Then after which, I watched high school musical!
Hello, I am troy's girlfriend. HAHA. Kidding. :P
Walked home, then realised that no one's at home, and I didn't bring my keys along..
So waited for my maid to come back from toa payoh to open the door for me. -.-
But it's alright.
I'm listening to way back into love now. :]
& talking to my miracle.
I wish gaygay was online.
I miss gaygay.
And shermin!
I miss shermin. :D
Okay, gaygay just came online. :D
God is so kind to me. <3
I am loved beyond my ability to comprehend.
10:52 AM
Just wanna say a very big THANK YOU to you people for being there for me, tagging my board, asking if I'm alright and all that. :D
From the bottom of my heart, I'm fine now. Serious, because God gave me a miracle on 17th of march. He gave me a reason to be happy again, He gave me to reason to cry the happy tears, He gave me faith in love again. He gave me cashmere hui yi hong. <3
I'm gonna sniff sniff people on monday! Haha! I'm mad la, different smells makes me happy/sad. Like sometimes when I'm super angry, and I smell pretzels.. HAHA, HAPPY AGAIN! & now I'm happy, if I smell.. cash - I'll be happier! :P
Ooooohkays, I shall go shower now. God knows where my whole family has gone to. Lalala, I'm having the whole house to myself now! Who wanna partaye? HAHAHAHA!
This time, let it last.
You're my one last try..
Saturday, March 17, 2007
10:52 PM600th post already!
Omg, that's fast. I should seriously stop multi-posting. -.-
17MARCH07! :]
Monehhhhhhh! :D
7:17 PM
WAHHHHHHHHH. THEN NOW STILL GOT I'M JUST GLAD?
HAHAHAHAHHAHA, HE'S GLAD TO LEAVE YOU LEH.
OKAY, STOP BEING A LOSER LA. IDIOT.
STILL HERE BARING YOUR HEART OUT.
WANNA LET PEOPLE LAUGH AT YOU IS IT?
OKAY LORH. LET YOU LAUGHLAUGHLAUGH FOR ALL I CARE.
I AM A CLOWN MAH.
6:44 PM
Haha, I think I'm getting normal already. Cos I just cried. Simply looking at your name makes me cry. Hahahhahahahha, I cried! Hahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahaha. Okay, maybe not so normal. -.- But with the first tear that fell, more will follow through. I don't think I'm gonna stop. How am I gonna fucking face you on monday when seeing you smile makes me feel dumb and retarded and sad and that you haven't loved me before?
You eat eat eat fat fat fat? I cry cry cry die die die la. ]:
Now I can't stop crying. Shitszx laaaaaaaaa. Tamade, how to be friends now? Okay, I swear that I won't ever date my friends. I'll go pick random people on the street next time. If there's ever a next time.
I hope I won't cry on mondayyyyyyy. I don't wanna cry in school la. Shit. I hate crying. Eh, heart you're back ah? Wah, I can feel you aching leh. Eh, please go away leh. I think you're the cause of the tears. See la, now my eyes have to work extra hard now. Fuck you la. Shoo off please, heart. I don't need you to feel pain. The nerves could do the job. Like in the afternoon I cooked clam chowder for lunch, I am omfg stupid. Normally I can hold the damn pot with one hand, and today I held it with two, but I still manage to spill some on my feet. Haha, omfgggggggggggg right. Hahahahahahahahhaa. Then ya la, then nerves did its job. I could feel the pain, so I don't need you heart. Hahahahahahahahhahaha. Come back after I can't even feel pain physically.
Hahahahha, I'm crazy. I bloody hell wish I didn't fall for youuuuuuuuuuu. Then I might have been able to crap with you now. Eh, xu yao qu kan yi sheng mah? I remember. & it hurts just thinking about it. I hate it when relationships are over. You have to start all over, alone. & you can't help missing the person, but you can't go talk to him because you're afraid that he'll say things that will hurt you or things that will make you think of him more.
I'm stewwwwwwpit la. Shouldn't have learnt from jan and mingming. You shen me shi jiu na chu lai jiang. I thought that would strengthen our bonds what. Who knows, it backfired. Next time if there's anything, just keep it to yourself la, bellebelle. You're not jan and mingming, understand? Okay, understood.
Hahah, sore throat and coughing like sai now. Wonderful! How bout having fever so you can drag not seeing him? Hmmmmm, wow. I think fever's here. Hello, fever. What's your temperature? 38.1 only? Please get hotter so you can fry my brains. Thank you. I think crying can make you hotter leh. Okay, please work harder, eyes and heart. Okay la, guess I still need heart.
& you know, just now watched wang zi bian qing wa. Junhao's so shuai la. Eh, prince charming, if I'm snow white, will you come please? -doesrealitycheck- Oh, I'm not snow white. HAHAHAHHAHA. Okay, never mind. I should stop watching teeveeeeeee. Espcially those that has ANYTHING to do with love. Which is almost everything on now. -.- Stupid producers. Write scripts that has nothing to do with love cannot ah? Trying to rub salt on my wound right! Thanks ah, nice massage. Stupid, tugtugtug my heartstrings. zzz.
Ya la, ya la. I'm loveless and unwanted la. Cannot ah, you jealous huh! Xu yao lai feng ci wo mah? Tao yaaaaaaan. Wow, I feel so light-headed now. Must be fever listening to me la. Thank yewwwwwwww. Wo shi qiang de please. Still can typetypetype. :D
I FUCKING WANT TO STOP MISSING YOU LA. WILL YOU PLEASE FUCKING CARE AND FUCKING TELL ME DAYS WITHOUT ME ARE HORRIBLE TOO. TAMADE LA. MISS YOU, MISS YOU LIKE SAI LA. THEN YOU ONLY KNOW HOW TO SAY EATEATEATFATFATFAT. JIDANGAO. WO MEI YOU NI HEN NAN GUO LA. LIKE WHAT I SAID BEFORE, I'LL GIVE YOU MY ALL BECAUSE I CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT YOU. I MEANT EVERY WORD I SAY. SHIT LA, NEXT TIME I SHOULD JUST TELL LIES. NOW I HURT SO BAD?
I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU ALL THINK LA. WANNA THINK I'M STUPID AND DUMB OR MAKING A BIG FUSS OUT OF IT, I DON'T GIVE A DAMN. DON'T LIKE ME JUST FUCKING SHOO OFF AND FUCK YOUR MOTHER LA.
FEVER FRIED MY BRAINS. I FEEL LOSER-ISH. SO I GET TWO HEARTS.
1:10 PM
I just finished watching dreamgirls on dvd. Those haven't caught it have to go watch it la. It's so super nice, and the songs are.. WOW. We are a family, like a giant tree. :D
I'm gonna download limewire all over again just to download the songs.
& I miss you by westlife is niceeeeee. Thanks, gaygay. [:
Thinthin!
I miss you, for every moment you're not here by my side.
I just can't breathe,
When your shadow is all over me, baby.
Don't wanna be a fool in your eyes,
'cause what we had was built on lies.
And when our love seems to fade away,
Listen to me - hear what I say...
I don't wanna feel the way that I do,
I just wanna be right here with you,
I don't wanna see, see us apart,
I just wanna say it straight from my heart:
I miss you...
What would it take for you to see?
To make you understand,
that I'll always believe (always believe)
You and I can make it through,
And I still know I can't get over you.
'Cause when our love seems to fade away,
Listen to me - hear what I say...
I don't wanna feel the way that I do,
I just wanna be right here with you,
I don't wanna see, see us apart (see us apart)
I just wanna say it straight from my heart:
Oh, baby I miss you, I do...
'Cause when our love always fades away,
Listen to me - hear what I say...
I don't wanna feel the way that I do,
I just wanna be right here with you,
I don't wanna see, see us apart, (oh no, see us apart)
I just wanna say it straight from my heart:
I miss you, I miss you, I do...
I don't wanna feel the way that I do (the way that I do)
I just wanna be (just wanna be) right here with you (right here with you)
I don't wanna see (don't wanna see) see us apart (see us apart, oh, baby)
I just wanna say it straight from my heart:
Oh baby I miss you, I do...
With words so beautiful, I wish you were still here.
Friday, March 16, 2007
8:55 PM"... says:
i wil be your listening ears when ever you need it"
This is from someone whom I haven't been talking to for a while..
Wah, she's super pro? Indian, malay and chinese all jio her, but got rejected. HAHA. INDIAN LEH, HELLO? She said all of them aren't her cup of teaaaaa. She likes coffee la. HAHA. She used to be crazy over malays, then I was wtf o.o shocked when she said she rejected malays la. HAHAHAHA.
She talked to me about relationships. She was full of crap and nonsense da dao li last time, but now she's changed. Still filled with loads of da dao li, but she's more matured and understanding this time. :] She made it a point to tell me that it's important to make sure you really love that person, and that person loves you before getting into a relationship.
I know and understand that, but you have no idea how difficult it is to find that person. It's like you could search far and wide, but you still can't find him. Not that I'm in a rush or anything, it's just that sometimes I feel so lost but I can't find the right person to talk to, and I'll let my imagination run wild again.
:D
CRYSTAL TAY BO XIN ROCKS LA. <3
But I'm gonna give one last try before going on a hiatus. :]
Would you be my last?
Or is it all in the past?
6:01 PM
5:46 PM
I'm home from simin's house already. I bought my orange hair band from mini toons and I saw tingting, leilei, eileen and serene at j8. Stewwwwpit la, they! Kept mocking me. HAHA, but loveeeeeees. <3 Tingting's so pweeeeetty laaaaas. HAHAHA.
I walked home from shaw plaza just now, and the sky was so beautiful. I was listening to smack that and I suddenly felt like I could strip myself bare and treat the world as my stage because I felt so sexy. HAHA, I'm mad la. I almost did can, my hands found its way to my shirt, and I was pulling it up slowly?! HAHA, heng I stopped myself in time. I'm crrrrrrankaye. Hahahahahahahahahahah.
Walao, I miss you la.
Hahahahahahahahahhahaha.
My blog song rawwwwwwks. :D
I love you, blog. & blog song.
Heeeeeheeeeeeee, aren't you flattered?
*blog grins and nods.
Awwwwww, so sweet.
Tagboard's screwed la, please. I can't tagggggg.
Okies, photos lataaaaaaaa.
2:14 PM
I'm at simin's place nowwwwwwwwww. :D
We went to j8, and I got my piercing. I only got one, because like no place to pierce some more unless I want to pierce at the bone, which I don't want to, because it hurts and I find it er xin la.
We had lunch at pastamania, and then we got our matching ripples slippers. ;DDDD
Mine's black and hers is whiteeeee. She said white is pure and innocent? HAHAHAHA.
She's playing audition now, and she's na bei-ing because she played with a noobie. LOL, my mei mei very vulgar horhhhhh. Heng ah, I'm niceeeeee. :D
HAHA, I can't believe it la, I still
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH, okay. I'm gonna go bang my head against the wall. SHIT LAAAAAAA. ]: BELLEBELLE YAO HAPPY LA, OKAY. HAO DE. KAI XIN YI DIAN!
STOP THINKING ABOUT THINGS AND PEOPLE THAT YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO. ^^
Bu yao gu fu gaygay de yi fan hao yi.
7:38 AM
Haha, did I scare all of you last night? Haha, don't have to worry too much la. I mean, look at me. I am strrrrrronger that you think I am okay! :D No problemo. I like to laugh laugh laught it off, so that it wouldn't hurt so much. I think it worked okay? Until I stupidly went to text him last night. Aiyah, and since he respects me so much that he has to forward my messages to people, I think there's nothing left for me to hide. HAHA. HE RESPECTS ME SO MUCH RIGHT.
Belle : I just need to know.. Do you still love me and if we'll ever be together again. & I promise I'll let you go.
Him : I still have feelings for you but I feel that I can't meet up to your expectations and make you happy and now I'm only making you doubt me and feel sad.
Belle : Okay. I'm sorry for having doubts in you. Haha. And the expectations stuff is nonsense. You were my best for 13 days though I throw tantrums.
Him : Ah I feel bad. Really sorry. I didn't want it to end this way=(
Belle : Don't feel bad. That's pitying me. I don't want it to end this way either. Haha. It's alright la. Just be happy.
Him : Haha ok.
Him : Don't feel bad. That's pitying me. I don't want it to end this way either. Haha. It's alright la. Just be happy. She replied.
Belle : Lol. And you're forwarding my msgs to someone? Haha. Thanks for respecting me.
Him : Yup need help I don't know what to say to you now sorry.
Belle : -.- Don't have to say anything now. Bye.
Him : Bye.
In which everything he says wasn't thought out by him. HAHA. I'm such a fool. I hope that person isn't ____. Like I don't feel sick enough already. If it really is ____, I think I can just go bang against the wall and die. Aiyah, whatever la. I don't careeeeeee. HAHAHAHAHAH.
It isn't the fact that you left me - it's the fact that you left me when I thought it through and thought that I was wrong, when I was about to let go of my pride and apologise ; and the fact that you left me when I needed you so. You didn't even have the guts to tell me yourself, I had to ask.
Haha, s_____'s right la. LOLLLLLLLLL.
& thanks juncheng for texting me and not being mean.
& thanks shermin for calling me and asking if I'm alright. (:
& thanks gaygay for always being there, 24/7, talking to me on msn, and texting me after I went off. <3
Don't worry, I'll be alright. I'll be stronger and I'll stay that way. I cried for like, 5 minutes last night only! Not because of the break up, but because I was so touched by what gaygay has said to me. It's in yesterday's post. 10:23PM.
I'm gonna pierce pierce pierce today! :D YAY, I LOVE HOLES. Hopefully I can meet peachie after simin and shermaine, because talking to her makes me feel better. (:
See, I'm alright. Did you notice I gave myself two hearts last night? It's because I needed it. I'm going back to one, because two hearts are given when I feel loser-ish and lost and sad. But come on, I'm not any of those. I AM ANNABELLE LEH! HAHAHAHAHA.
Thursday, March 15, 2007
10:34 PMHAHAHAHAHHAAHHAHA, I'M GONNA MULTIPLE POST LIKE CRAZY.
CAN I SAY I DON'T LOVE YOU ALL THAT MUCH NOW? SHIT, I JUST GOT DITCHED. OKAY, KARMAAAA. FOR DITCHING SO MANY PEOPLE LAST TIME. WHATEVERRRRR.
I TRIED MY BEST TO CHERISH, AND IT ONLY LASTED 13 DAYS. I DIDN'T WANT IT TO END SO SOON, THAT'S WHY I SAY WHATEVER IS ON MY MIND. BUT GUESS YOU DON'T APPRECIATE THAT? OKAY, WHATEVER. I GAVE YOU MY ALL, AND YOU FED IT TO YOUR DOGS. BYEBYE, HEART. SOMEONE CHEWED YOU OFF LEH. HOW AH? SHOULD I CRY AND TRY TO GET YOU BACK? AIYAH, I THINK LET YOU GET CHEWED TO LITTLE LITTLE PIECES BETTER LA. USELESS HEART. BYEBYEBYEBYE. HE SAID WE'RE BETTER OFF BEING FRIENDS. HE DIDN'T PHRASE IT THAT WAY. MY ENGLISH BETTER LA, HORH? HAAHHAHAH. ISN'T IT GREAT NOW? I AM RETURNING TO SINGLEHOOD AGAIN! HAHAHAHAHA. BYE BYE BOYFRIEND. THOUGH I GAVE YOU EVERYTHING. OKAY, I DIDN'T GIVE YOU MY HAND NOR MY KISSES. HAHAHA, CAN I ASK IF YOU STILL LOVE ME NOW? AHAHHAHAHA. HAHAHAHAHAHA. HAHAHAHAHAHA. HAHAHAHAHA. HAHAHAHAHA. I DESERVE TO BE HAPPY? AHAHAHHAHAA. OKAY. HAHAHAHAHAHA. HAHAHAHA. HAHAHAHAHAHA. HAHAHAHAHAHAH. GOODBYE LOVE. HAHAHAHAHA. YOU HELD MY HEART FOR 13 DAYS. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. HAHAHAHA. HOW DOES IT FEEL TO DITCH SOMEONE LIKE ME. HAHAHAHAHAHA. MUST BE GREAT RIGHT. HAHAHAHA. I THINK SO TOO. AHHAHAHA. GREAT MINDS THINK ALIKE. HAHAHAHAHA. AHAHAHHA. I COULD LAUGH AND LAUGH AND LAUGH, AND I KNOW SOMEONE WILL BE LAUGHING WITH/AT ME TOO. AHAHHAHAHA. I KNOW. HAHAHAHAHA. BUT WHO CARES. HAHAHAHA. I WEAR MY HEART ON MY SLEEVES. I LET MY EMOTIONS FLOWFLOWFLOW. HAHAHAHA. UNTIL THEY OVERFLOW. HAHAHAHAHAHA. HAHAHAHA. YOU MUST BE FEELING DAMN GREAT NOW. HAHAHAHHA. I HOPE YOU'RE READING THIS. HAHAHAHAHA. SO YOU CAN LAUGH AT ME. AHAHAHHAHA. I HOPE ALL OF YOU ARE. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. I'M SUCH A JOKE LA. HAHAHAHHAAHAHAHA. LISTENING TO BEN LAI NOW. HAHAHAHAHA. YI JING GUO QU LE LA. HAHAHAHAHA. BU HUI ZAI BAO HU WO. HAHAHAHAHAHA. BEN LAI BU JUE DE NI TE BIE TENG WO. HAHAHAHHAAH. ZHI DAO NI FANG QI AI WO YI HOU. HAHAHAHAHA. NI YOU TENG GUO WO MEH. HAHAHAHA. MY HEAD ALMOST GOT SMASHED YESTERDAY BY A BASKETBALL. AHHAHAA. YOU DIDN'T MAKE ANY SINGLE ATTEMPT TO RUN TO SHIELD ME. HAHAHAHAHAH. YOU JUST CALLED OUT TO ME. HAHAHAHAHA. WHATEVER. HAHAHAHAHA. WHY AM I STILL CONTINUING THIS SHIT. AHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA. APPARENTLY I'M GOING CRAZY. HAHAHAHA. WHO CARES. I KNOW YOU DON'T. HAHAHAHAHA. I'M NOT WALLOWING IN SELF PITY PLEASE. HAHAHAHAHA. COME ON LA. HAHAHAHA. IT'S ME LEH. ANNABELLE TAN. AHAHAHAHAH. THIS SHOULD END NOW. AHHAHAHA. I'M GONNA MAKE CHANGES TO BLOG TOMORROW. HAHAHAHAA. I'M GONNA PIERCE PIERCE PIERCE TILL I FEEL THE PAIN. AHHAHAHA. I LOVE HOLES. AHAHAHAHHA.
10:23 PM
Okay, I just cried.
haaappykid xD says:*plucks ears out
haaappykid xD says:*passes to bellebelle
haaappykid xD says:gaygay says : go on, use it :D
You're the best, gaygay. <3
10:17 PM
Haha, I feel so stupid.
He removed 030307 from his nick, so I guess he meant that it's the end for us?
Okay. I got ditched. HAHAHAHAHAHA.
ZOMG, BIGGEST JOKE EVER.
Why am I trying to be sarcastic when I'm dying inside? I can't even cry now. ]:
9:18 PM
Bellebelle is crazy. She wants 3 more piercings on her ears and she wants to dye her hair black/ black blue/ purple. & she's going out with simin to pierce and buy her slippers.
& she misses her boyfriend a lot, but her pride's getting in the way. She doesn't want to text him first, but she's been waiting the whole day for him to text her. She bets he's having such a great time without her that he's gonna break up with her soon. & juncheng said that he's more protective of sheryl. That makes bellebelle very sad. She wished she waited a while more and let him ask the question instead of forcing a decision out of him. She wants him to be online now.. ]:
& at the end of the day, I still can't help missing you.
5:43 PM
I've known you all fourteen years of my life, and I've always held you close to my heart, no matter how bad our fights get. You've never ever told me one lie, never. I've never ever doubted you once, never. But now, forever and ever, I'll remember ; you just told me the first. A lie that killed me. I'd never thought you would do something like that, something that would change your life forever if you were ever caught. You know I hate it, and you told me you would never try. How could anyone be so stupid to kill themselves so slowly just to make sure they fit in the clique? Stupid. So are you going to do drugs next? I said I would severe ties with you if I ever found out, but I don't have the heart to do so. You're closer to me than anyone else in the family. I still can't figure. Whatever happened to you, I can't tell. I just hope you'll wake up soon. I need you back. You were my best. You knew me from head to toe. It's all gonna change now..
Screw the world, I'm such a failure.
What more can I expect from a person whom I've been together with for 13 days when I can't even figure a person I've known all my life?
I give up. Let everything come all at once, and take me away. I hate everything's that happening now.
Where are you when I need you so?
Wednesday, March 14, 2007
9:06 PMThere are times when I just want to cry my heart out - and this is one of those times.
Why am I still trying so hard to hold on when clearly we are so mismatched and wrong? Why am I trying so hard to prove the others wrong when clearly we can't even tell if we're meant to be? Why am I still doubting when I should have enough trust and faith in you and our relationship now? Why do I feel so empty now? Why does my heart feels as if it's dead? Why does tears well up? Why do I feel like ending this once and for all? Why do I feel like thrashing things out with you? Why can't you be more interested in my life? Why can't I talk about so many things with you? Why do I feel so angry at you? Why do I feel that you don't give a fucking damn about us? Why do I feel that you don't really love me? Why do I feel so lost even when I have you around? Why are you so insensitive to my feelings? Why do you not know how to comfort me? Why do you feel so distant? Why do I love you? Why do I miss you when you're not around? Why do I feel the way I do? Why am I even writing all these now?
Why did I even fall for you from the start?
& I can't let you go. Not now..
8:44 PM
Note to self : please look for these qualities in your next boyfriend before jumping into the pit.
- Needs to know how to control me. He needs to know when to be insistent and when to let me win.
- Needs to be rich. Who wants a boyfriend that can't afford to buy a pair of movie tickets?
- Needs to have good dress sense. It makes me happy.
- Shower me with love and gifts.
- Give me surprises.
- Shows that he loves me.
- Is okay with PDA. [public display of affection]
- Tags my blog. -.- Sounds dumb, but I want that to happen without me asking can?
- Needs to be funny and lame.
- Needs to be understanding and forgiving.
- Needs to be at least average looking.
- Wears braces? :P
- Needs to love me through my imperfections.
- Needs to be able to listen to my problems and offer help.
- Comfort me when I'm down and under.
- Does not laugh at me when I'm crying. -.-
- Intelligent. Passes his exams without studying. ^^
Seems impossible eh? Okay, he just needs to fufill at least 13 requirements.
6:23 PM
I still love you, yes I do. But I'm so tired of holding hopes of you actually taking initiative, or simply just making me feel loved. You make me happy, yes. But you don't make me feel loved. I can't get through your head, probably because it's too thick. I don't know, I don't know. I need to reconsider. I don't know, I don't know. I'm damn bloody confused. Not because I'm afraid I'll be single again, but because I can't tell if you feel the same for me.
Why am I typing all these, when I know you won't even be bothered to read?
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
10:56 PM
:D
Sorry if it's a little messy. Lazy to go arrange. Heh.